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Adele ‘ready to date again’ after split from husband Simon Konecki: ‘She’s attracted to other men’
A friend once told me his test of whether he's over an ex is whether it would bother him if they were dating someone else. Under that logic, I've never gotten over anyone in my life. Months and sometimes years after a relationship, my heart rate still accelerates when I see an ex is dating someone new on Facebook. Over a year after I ended one relationship, I found some photos on Facebook of my ex with a woman I didn't recognize. It was like we were still together and he cheated. I wasn't entitled to feel this way — I broke up with him! After I last spoke to another fling I never even officially dated, I made sure to unfollow him on Facebook so I didn't have a similar experience. But that didn't stop his new profile picture, with an unknown woman next to him. Sure, she could be a friend, but seeing two people in the same profile picture is basically a giveaway.
The next thing that happens after you break up with someone — this is after the tears, the drama, the denial, the anger, the acceptance, maybe a sneaky shag, more anger, more acceptance and then closure — is moving on. Some people start dating to force themselves to move on, some to bury the pain and yes, some are just ready to jump back in the saddle. You should be focusing on yourself and your own future rather than worrying about his. If you have had the chance to lick your wounds, heal, learn and move on, you stand a better chance of happiness. There must be time to heal. Catch up with friends and family, ramp up the social life and enjoy plenty of me time where you get to be and do exactly what you want.
Does this mean you still love them? Are these feelings normal? These are common questions you may ask yourself when your ex starts dating again. You spent a large part of your life with this person, and during the years you were together, dating and married, you came to think of that person as your true significant other. You two were a couple and to see your spouse with someone else will trigger feelings in you that may be surprising and unpleasant. It does not mean you are still in love but rather you are witnessing the evidence that your spouse now has someone else in the place you used to fill.
When your ex husband starts dating again
To illustrate how much the timeframe can vary, we talked to nine women about how long it took them to take that scary leap of faith. It ended up being a total disaster—the guy was criticizing how I ate pizza—so I had to cut that nightmare short and have a friend come pick me up. It gave me more time to get to a better place mentally and emotionally and sort through and address the feelings I was having.